With it being just over two weeks into the new year I haven't as of yet started any of my resolutions for the following reasons 1) I have been ill from before Christmas with a viral infection which is causing me to faint and take anxiety attacks thus stopping me going to the gym 2) I have started a new theatre company and I am stressed about people not turning up to join 3) I am no longer a person of positive thinking but instead am a 5 foot 5 being of stess....not good (think of the grey hairs!) and finally 4) my car has broken down (which makes no difference at the minute as I'm housebond due to being ill)...but even still, it's not a positive thing.
I need to take a step back and try and find my central zen....I need to try to destress, get my health back on track, enjoy new experiences and try to become a positive thinker....although as many know, this is easier said than done.
I need to get in touch with my spiritual side, maybe join a yoga class, go to a spa for a couple of days and start referring to myself as moonbeam?....
And breathe.......
Wednesday, 16 January 2013
Wednesday, 2 January 2013
Something's got to give....
Sometimes in life things keep happening and knocking back your confidence. For example, at this moment in time I have done nothing but get rejected from job applications, graduate schemes and PGCE courses...it makes me wonder what exactly is wrong with me? I like many of thousands of other graduates were lead to believe the world would be our oyster upon graduation....alas! It was all lies!
A recent article on www.bbc.co.uk news website stated that 1 in 10 youth felt worthless due to the recession....well I am in that percentage. I feel as though there is something hideously wrong with me as a person due to constantly reciving rejection and unsuccessful letters/emails.
I truely with all my heart and soul want to be a drama teacher, it's where my passion has been from I could walk and talk....surely that's a good thing? Although, why do I constantly feel as though I'm not good enough for this profession. I'm starting to believe that there is a black X against my name in employment and trying to be happy at the moment. I feel as though I'm waking up and living through my days like a zombie, I'm unhappy with how things are panning out and it's affecting my daily live - anxiety, depression, illness.....all due to constantly feeling rejected....Something has got to give at some point......right?!
A recent article on www.bbc.co.uk news website stated that 1 in 10 youth felt worthless due to the recession....well I am in that percentage. I feel as though there is something hideously wrong with me as a person due to constantly reciving rejection and unsuccessful letters/emails.
I truely with all my heart and soul want to be a drama teacher, it's where my passion has been from I could walk and talk....surely that's a good thing? Although, why do I constantly feel as though I'm not good enough for this profession. I'm starting to believe that there is a black X against my name in employment and trying to be happy at the moment. I feel as though I'm waking up and living through my days like a zombie, I'm unhappy with how things are panning out and it's affecting my daily live - anxiety, depression, illness.....all due to constantly feeling rejected....Something has got to give at some point......right?!
Tuesday, 1 January 2013
Happy New Year!
It is amazing how quickly time flies! I cannot believe that we are into another year! Today is the day when people wake up in a positive, can do attitude, believing that they will truely stick to their resolutions this year....not that they ever have before but it's a new year and therefore a 'new start'.
I have decided that I will not make any proper new years resolutions as I will fail them *fantastic can do attitude Nicola*....I wish I could join the gym like I did last year on my Janauary whim but actually go to it rather than spending X amount of money per month for me to simply contiue sitting on my bottom and eating fatty food to then complain about the amount of weight I wasn't loosing!
This is my compiled list of resolutions that I will try my damnedest to keep:
1) Pick an amazingly witty name for my drama group
2) Bring my obsession with Vampire Diaries to another level
3) Get my equity card
4) Conquer my life long dream of becoming a unicorn
5) Eat more crisps
6) Enter the Great British Bakeoff and win
7) Write an award winning novel then turn it into a successful stage show.
8) Get R Patz to leave K Stew and realise his love for me
9) Stop being such an anxiety attack central person
10) Make a 'Girl Code' and tell people to 'slut up'....ala' Barney Stinson
These seem reasonable enough surely?
Enjoy making your resolutions people of the world...I give you all 4 weeks before you begin to fail (and that is me being generous).
I have decided that I will not make any proper new years resolutions as I will fail them *fantastic can do attitude Nicola*....I wish I could join the gym like I did last year on my Janauary whim but actually go to it rather than spending X amount of money per month for me to simply contiue sitting on my bottom and eating fatty food to then complain about the amount of weight I wasn't loosing!
This is my compiled list of resolutions that I will try my damnedest to keep:
1) Pick an amazingly witty name for my drama group
2) Bring my obsession with Vampire Diaries to another level
3) Get my equity card
4) Conquer my life long dream of becoming a unicorn
5) Eat more crisps
6) Enter the Great British Bakeoff and win
7) Write an award winning novel then turn it into a successful stage show.
8) Get R Patz to leave K Stew and realise his love for me
9) Stop being such an anxiety attack central person
10) Make a 'Girl Code' and tell people to 'slut up'....ala' Barney Stinson
These seem reasonable enough surely?
Enjoy making your resolutions people of the world...I give you all 4 weeks before you begin to fail (and that is me being generous).
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